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Jokes!

August 31, 2009

I might have posted these before, but I just found them again and I think they’re funny.

#1

A man and his wife are sitting in the living room and he says to her:
“Just so you know, I never want to live in a vegetative state dependent on some machine. If that ever happens, just pull the plug.”
His wife gets up and unplugs the TV.

#2

The husband had just finished reading the book, “The Man of the House.”

He stormed into the house and walked directly up to his wife. Pointing a finger in her face, he said, “From now on, I want you to know that I am the man of this house and my word is law!

Right now, I want you to prepare me a gourmet meal, and when I’m finished eating my meal, I expect a sumptuous dessert afterward. Then after dinner, you’re going to draw me my bath so I can relax. And when I’m finished with my bath, GUESS WHO’S going to dress me and comb my hair?”

His wife replied, “The funeral director?”!

#3

Who was the first women in the Bible with PMS? It was Mary. She rode Joseph’s ass all the way to Egypt.

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