Yes, it’s another repost!

June 15, 2009

Since script writing and painting our bathroom is taking up most of my time, I find it necessary to do this repost from my old blog.  It was written a couple of years ago when we first bought this house…enjoy.

He Who Lives In Glass Houses

Yesterday we finally got the green house moved to our new abode (not that we’re living there yet, we were just able to move a few outside things early).  And if, earlier, I thought our marriage was going to last because it survived the building of the green house, I am now CERTAIN our marriage will last because it has survived the moving of the green house.  Picture this…

A stripped down version of the green house, the frame and roof still intact but with all of the doors and side panels taken off.  Now imagine that baby perched on and strapped to a small trailer that is hitched to a small pick up truck…now think of a smaller pick up truck, and now think of the smallest pick up truck ever made, that only has one gear left.  Now you’ve got it!  But I’m getting ahead of myself.  Getting it on the trailer and over the fence was half the fun.

Mr. Dragon and his friend Eric moved the frame to the fence.  This is where I entered the picture.  I was stupid enough to be outside smoking a cigarette while they were there moving it.  So naturally I got called over to help them out.  So swearing under my breath, I went to the other side of the fence, where my job was to help keep it balanced as it sat on top of the fence (so they could slide it over).  Hmmmm…What the hell is wrong with this picture???  Two guys pushing a green house frame over a fence at me (Oh yeah, I’m standing on a hill too) and I’m supposed to help keep it balanced??  A frame that it took two men to move!  Sure, why not, I thought to myself?  I always wanted to know what it would feel like to be two feet tall and have freakishly long arms.  Anyway, somehow it got balanced and as Mr. Dragon was walking from their side of the fence to mine, it started tipping up and I told Eric if my feet started dangling he should slide it my way more.  Hey, here’s a tip, never make a guy laugh that is helping you hold up something heavy!  It slid a bit more but he managed to slide it back and we got it balanced.  Somehow we managed to get it on the back of the trailer without levitating powers, or what my brother-in-law refers to as doing something by “FM” (friggin’ magic).  And my job after that was simple.  I was to follow in my car and if he was getting close to anything, like tree limbs or POWER LINES, I was to honk my horn.   At this point in the story I would like to say that this green house, which was precariously perched on top of a trailer was only held into place by a bungee cord.  One bungee cord.  SOOO we set off and the first thing that happened was that it got too close to a tree limb and it hit the frame and broke one of the struts.  I later pointed out that I didn’t honk because I was too busy freaking out and praying that it didn’t fall backwards and smash me and my car.  In fact, most of the way there I alternated between praying and swearing my brains out.  But I wasn’t alone in this.  I could see people’s faces as they passed him going the opposite direction.  They were mouthing out obscenities and making hand gestures.  Heh

We finally made it to our new house and I could just imagine our new neighbors peeking out of their windows going, “Look at those crazy bastards!!” and “If they knock on the door for help, shoot’em!”  But we got it off the trailer, with the only damage being the broken strut, so that’s not too bad.  Let’s just hope the rest of the move is a lot less “interesting”.


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